"it rains in your bedroom, everything is wrong..
here's to evth that comes down to nothing"

i cant sleep &decided to blog bout my feelings cos i kinda feel shitty right now .

i think im a pretty messed up girl.
why th fuck am i so complicated.

im sorry , i really feel so pathetic right now. i always let my anger get th best of me. but i somehow managed to control my feelings this time. y'know just cool down, cry a river, &just reflect. but moments ago, evth just proved to be unnecessary. i feel like youre pushing me away. yeah i was kind of harsh in my previous posts. i felt like i was being toyed, really. when you were here, its like u talked to me so often.. i even remembered you msging me bout how you felt when you couldnt sleep one night even tho i was sleeping. then now, overseas &your internet all. i guess u went there too sudden &it was hard for me to adapt to changes. that made me make stupid assumptions.


i really feel so guilty for th situation right now. im sorry.


whats my damn problem ?
i really dont know..

ya i understand. like totally.
just.. enjoy your time there.

seems like im never gona get this to you altho i dropped like super enormous hints.


whatever;

anyway, thanks isa for accompanying me today(:
i had my stiches on my gums removed &finally got to eat beef! &also, thanks isa for getting me a cheap deal for my adaptor(:
owe you one.

just find me when you're bored. im really tired of this.

you dont even care bout my welfare when im sick. why do i even bother.

terase ? then better knock urself hard on th head now,

&tell yourself that youre really one stupid jerk &try to change th situation now.

dont bother asking me if im referring to you, cos i wont admit.

headache. bye.