" sometimes i trip & fall, but i know where i stand. "

hi , this room/hotel is filled with so much memories);

lovers to friends, friends to strangers. isnt that so fcking cool (: (sense th sarcasm? hah)
why oh why.
why do feelings change, why do ppl change. why does this feeling come &visit all of a sudden.
please, clear ur thoughts ly, dont turn back....

my heart feels so numb. like there's a missing piece of puzzle in ur life.
living in denial? hah, its funny how u think u rly know urself.

i realise these days , i feel really weird. i tend to get disappointed over myself if i think i've hurt someone in a way by what i say. i dont know, this is really weird. well, everyone has their faults right ? no one is falwless. we should accept others for their imperfections(: esp among my girlfriends. idk what im saying, but i think i got my point across. but ah, if that someone goes over th limit, that one different story ah. hah.

y'know, i rly dont know what im trying to say in this post.

DAHDAH GO STUDY PEOPLE,
NO TIME SADSAD &ANGRYANGRY,
KEEP SMILING !!! :DD
__________

"you're th one to built me up &tear me down,"

stepping down on th 22nd of may :(
omg la, i rly dont want to cos i think i haven't done enough.
hai, ok, trust th new sncos(: i'll be coming back anyways, for sure.

OH! before that, im still not satisfied with some issues, yes, i have LOADS of issues.
revenge is definitely sweet right? but its sinful):
ok, one last time, a good one(: just for my beloved unit, hehehe.
well, sometimes u just have to so ppl wont STEP OVER UR HEAD!

" didn't mummy told you not to play with fire ? (:"

as expected, trip to firestation was god damn exciting :DD
(pics at my facebook)

oh, like myra said, no matter how much we complain about our cadets/training, how cekik darah they are, they're still our cadets &no one can disturb us. KORANG PAHAM?!
it's like literally playing with fire y'know(: &you're no match for it :D Muahahaha.

one more thing, doesn't mean im a leader, i cant break th rules. rules are meant to be broken, &sometimes. rules have to be broken so you can have your rights. but of course, i know my limit, &i bet you guys do too(:

kiss ma arse, losers :D

"life is a maze, &love is a riddle. "

MYRAA~FIRESTATION TMR!
*winks*

hehe, okay shd i go to th ncdcc day parade to represent my fcking dumb school or not ?
it'll be awkward cos its been long since i went to cd activities, hais. what more, th hq told us at th very last minute AND th training is fr 5 consecutive days after mid years! &idk if there's points or wdv, but i dont caaaaaare, i just want th experience!
Os is one thing, &imagine how dark i'll be! (im so not gona sacrifice my face again fr a fucking parade)

but th thing is, we get to go in th flag barrier contingent at th very last moment, cos they need more WOs. &what more, we get to wear no.1 &it would be a huge & last event as a cadet! aaaaaah, dilemma!!

(Someone) says:
*come on, be part of history. the first ever ncdcc parade
*and you'll be wearing no.1
*carrying your unit flag

unit flag? hmm. a good chance to burn it.
HAHAHAH! K, KIDDING.
_________

you can hate me all you want, by all means. idk how many times i've said this. but i'll say it again. you dont know how difficult it is okay. all these change. i fucking hate bottling things up when im not good at it. yeah, maybe i was living in denial but now i know what i want. i just fucking want to concentrate on Os okay. u wana say thats just bullshit , up to u . u can tell ur lovely brothers evth i do , cos i know surely they look at me as someone who doesnt appreciate u fr what uve done, someone who treats u like fucking shit. well wdv. they're th last bunch of people i would ever listen to, &that includes you. you dont want to study or buck up, its none of my business anymore. its just you? well , ppl change, so can you if you try. but ure not even trying to why shd i even care when i've got my life to worry about. i cant giv a fucking shit bout this relationship thing, yes i did have feelings fr you. dont u think all these is just infatuation? all these are just bullshit? dont you think if were tgt, we wont even last till god knows when? relationships are just temporary, why bother bout it when we can have fun all we want at this age. u can always find ur partner in th future when ure more matured right. i bet in few years time, you'll just forget bout me . its always like that. so buddy, listen up good. maybe its th past that made me this way. but thank god. it rly made me look at a brighter side of life. a life without regrets. i love th way things are now. although in ur eyes, were far apart. all i can say is, its just what you think. cos mid years are close , &i rly dont wana screw it up.sometimes u just have to sacrifice smth in ur life for ur future y'know. lies? hah, its getting anoying each time we fight(idk why we even have to).
its not me, its you.

"better things i look forward to in life"

OK THIS IS DAMN NICE. ITS BROWNIES WITH TOPPINGS.
&TH BROWNIES ARE HEAVENLY !

thinking of buying a whole set fr gfs? when i have th kaching(:
puas makan:D (mind you, i ate only 1-.-) hahaha.

" lets have some fun this beat is sick. "


SYMBOL OF LOVE FROM- BEDOK SOUTH?!
KISS MY ASS.
HAHAHAHA! bias school ehhh.

speechday; everyone was great. yeah, my post will be a couple of sentences these few days again. wooOoOoooO~

ALL HAIL TH NOTICEBOARD.
"yes maam! 1 noticeboard.. 2 noticeboard..30 noticeboard.."
will be expecting alot of that in th upcoming trainings! HAHAHAHA,

i've got a toothache &i've been screaming in pain since just now.
god's punishment for me cos i didn't listen to my mum. fell asleep ytd &she woke me up &forced me to brush my teeth before sleeping-.- of course, i was dead tired &continued sleeping like a pig although she tried to steal my pillow. k, sorry mum D:

last ever parade for sec4s tmr before we step down! all th best to everyone :D

this is th clock upon th wall, this is a story of us all . pictures of you , pictures of me, remind us all of what we used to be , confess to me, every stolen promise you believe. confess to meee, all th lies between us, all th lies between you and meeeeeeee !!!!!!!!!

yeah , whatever , i'll just change th photos in th frame. HAH.

midyears=stress. our relieving of stress session((:

"these memories are playing like a film without sound."


one question , will th memory of us fade as soon as i leave this school?
when we talked all night about the rest of our lives, 18/10/08 (:

" &it makes me smile,"

EXCO(:

my brother's helping me drill my shelf. &im sitting here with earplugs stuffed into my ears. BISING. i almost got deaf trying to drill th wall myself at first ! butbut, i put up my mirror myself(: aww im so proud of myself. ahaha.

class phototaking tmr! :DD anyway , its amazing how th cream my parents bought fr me can vanish my panau(s) in one day. but then again, it'll appear after my training everytime.
oh well. at least it can disappear :D

a few stuff to say before i go:
1)'you' can do whatever you like friend. if ignoring this matter will prove to everyone that i've moved on, i will :D
2)say wdv you want. i know & 'you' know who's at th losing end :D

&& not to forget, i wana say sorry to th prettyboy down there, &also a thanks fr always being there fr me(&he's just a very close friend &this is just random)

okay need to help, BYE!

"boy i can be evth that you need,"

HAPPY NCDCC DAY TO NCDCC CADETS! (laugh out loud)

i just made a fool out of myself today . haha. as much as i didnt want to go up th stage, i had to. where to put my face! hahah, okay wdv. yang sudah tu sudah(:

2 rows right behind me &myra. those two damn cute kann:D

k then 2.4 today was a huge disappointment. damnit, i shdn't have eaten&drank right before th run. didnt have stitches since idk when &suddenly it came back today. bodohh kannnn. k nvm.

at least there's th parade rehearsel, well smth that im happy and contented with. though many had classes to attend or better, cabut. how i wish my cadets are like other ugs. how i wish there isn't any gangster wannabes in my unit. haaaai~
thenthen, as usual , took th lift with th usuals to our room. &i think th lift has some magic cos it nvr fails to make us high after training(haha, dah bebual merepek).
then from th top, we saw th ncc still marching eventho it was raining &we're like wow. summore semangat cheer! BOOYAH, HOOHAH!! hahaha. &We got high cos they're somehow like doing a rain dance! hahaha, okay , no offence ncc, really. i dont mean any harm ((:

anyways, my sec1s are really adorable(how many times have i said that?)
they came to me &myra aft training &chit-chatted with us. &i found out hakim's dirty little secret((: hahaha .
kay, i'm mean. i shd stop disturbing lower sec people. ooops(:

*yawns*

"I may be your sweet spot
Take me to your candy shop(:"

hi. im really bored, im gna start my revision on my ss soon.

dad's gona start drilling furniture soon, &it will get damn noisy.
&my past is rushing back altho i made a decision to leave it all behind.
okay, it's all in my hands (:

&my phone is annoying. it receives texts hours aft it's sent.
keeps resetting too. everything keeps resetting.
i wish my life could reset too. hahaha! no, im just kidding.

ohh, today's training was kind of fun+scary,
haha, fawwaz me myra were discussing on our future careers to prison to ghosts to penunggu at corners of th room.
&i got freaked out. ohhh, i found out why d&t workshops are not allowed to be used on friday evenings! haha okay shut up ly .

WHO LET TH DOGS OUT? HAHAHA, I SEE SO MANY DOGS OBEDIENTLY OBEYING THEIR OWNERS!

my lovely blue turqoise watch has a slight tear at th band, &keeps resetting and th stopper thing is gone !
omg, i fucking love it dearly okaaaaaaaay)):

haaaaaaaaai, okay. i bought furniture yesterday. im sitting on my new sofa bed, yay!
my room's in a mess right now, & my mum's nagging.

I NEED TO STUDYYYYYYYY, there's science CT tmr fr god's sake! &i have like, 3 english compre+summary to finish? !!
GOSH LEAVE ME ALONE LAAA. BISINGGGGGG .

STRESS AH, STRESS !

"once or twice was enough, &it was all in vain"

yos .

confessions of a shopaholic is a must watch(:

past few days has been exciting i must say. i dont think i even want to write everything down here. speech day is coming soon. napha(5 stations) was okay i guess, but i feel i want to retake. &my stomache muscle is aching so badly , that i went home &slept right after catching th movie with th girls. gosh.

u never knew how much this friendship means to me, never knew th wonders u brought in my life despite ur attitude i've been putting up with. u think i have no feelings ? well great. just go away,

"crash &burn by simple plan"

hi im blogging 2 times in a row.

im proud to say i can start on my d&t product already. claps for me:D im right on track. yayy . haha.
okay , i just bought macs upsize fr lunch &hellopanda. die la, tmr is napha, &im eating fattening food. i bet i can only do inclined pull up &shuttle run. th rest, gone case. there goes th gold i wanted. haha its okay. i'll do 50 situps tonight. (mcm betul hahaha)

oh! speech day's coming, which means, last chance for me to show everyone cd footdrill bagus! haha, &mr clement's gg to hta just to get our pacesticks again(: what more, im rly looking forward to trainings. 4 of them became snco alr, &i can see a HUGE difference(: &my sec1s! i cant help but to repeat this, theyre so fucking adorable in their uniform ! they're cooperative too! haha cant deny they're th best batch of sec 1s :D i reaaaaaaaaly dont wana step down ):
i lovelove my unit ((: